Hello Bloggers,
I was not sure if I was going to blog about this or not, but here I am. I havent been feeling like myself the last two days, and my mind has been wondering like crazy. I got my LSAT score in, and I did awful. Unfortunately, its not a good enough mark to get into law school for September 2011. I tried so hard, that it hurts to look at that score, it really does. I know I can re write in June, and I am going to, but its just one of those things that still sucks. Writing this blog brings tears to my eyes because I feel so discouraged, dissapointed, sad, and angry. I studied since July, maybe not as hard as I should of, but I really did put my mind to it, and what went wrong? I'm not sure.
The past two days, I feel like I'm walking around in my own little world, and yes inside I'm sad. I've been trying to put on a smile, and pretend its okay, but inside I'm not okay. To some people it might be just a test, but to me it is beyond that, the feelings that are bounded inside of me right now, have shown me that. I know that I promised myself, I'd be happy either way, and I am, that I was able to accomplish the test but the poor test result, has given me a really low self-esteem right now.
When people that I knew in the past took the test, and did poorly, I couldn't understand why they were as bummed out as they were, and now I can feel why. I feel like I took only one thing out of this experience, and that is, never judge someones feelings or thoughts, they have reasoning behind it. We may, or may not agree with them or the situation, but its how they feel. I am going to try to understand that and accept that of others, as I hope I can feel accepted.
I don't want to make this post really upsetting, so I can share with you a few things that made me smile. Mr Curious heard alot of yelling yesterday because I was just too upset and sad. My parents were soooo extremely encouraging, even though I felt like they just didn't understand, their support was there. Also, a close friend was very supportive and told me she was proud of me either way, also a good feeling.
I hope tomorrow is better than today!
Goodnight <3
S.
Sweetie, you'll be fine. I didn't get into teacher's college on my first try. I remember going to class at uni the night that I was rejected from the last school and all of these other people had gotten in and were so happy. The funny thing is, the year off was great and I got in the following year. I also got a job right out of teacher's college, which is really hard to do! Everything happens for a reason, even when it sucks at first, but just keep on being positive! I look at things this way - I can't change the past, and brooding over it will effect positive things in your future. Learn from where you went wrong and then let it go! I'm sure you'll do great next time!
ReplyDeleteaww i'm sorry to hear this! But look at the bright side, learn from this experience and work even harder next time and you will succeed b.c you know what to expect now. Try to think positive and have hope for a better tomorrow :) do what makes u happy in the mean time and stay strong. Life always has it's ups and downs but unfortunately we have to deal with it and try to look past it. Practice makes perfect :)
ReplyDeleteOh hon...try not to be too hard on yourself. I think they gear those LSATs so most people have to take them more then once! Chin up!
ReplyDeleteJust checking in....hope you are doing well!
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